About Saturday

So, this past Saturday was homecoming for my school...I have to say it was my favorite one so far, aha.

Any way, besides the almost assured death due to a friend's driving and getting trapped in a rather large group of grinding young adults...it was pretty good. I also should point out that the same friend gave Mr. C a ride too, which was pleasant.

As for the dance itself, I'll try to keep it short when saying that I received a lot of good signals from him including him striking up a conversation with me or dancing with me (though I have to admit I can't dance ahaha). Another thing worth mentioning is that he texted me as soon as I was dropped off and we talked until midnight and yesterday (Sunday) and also this morning he texted me as soon as he woke up.

We talked quite a bit about who I'm crushing on since he did ask, but the way he replied led me to think that he's already aware of my crush--which, for me would be utterly embarrassing....am I that easy to read? But at the same time I feel that he might, too, be oblivious. We'll have to see how it turns out, I suppose.

So, despite the obvious signs, I don't know if he really does or doesn't like me...call me oblivious or perhaps insecure, but I usually need quite a bit more solid 'proof' that he does like me.

Patiently Anxious

Currently, I'm waiting for a text back from Mr. Taurus (he won't be able to see it until later, though)...Being a mostly organized person, I would like to keep my feelings "in check" and certainly make sure that if I am feeling this way for someone, that they feel the same.
Hopefully, we'd still be friends either way...I'd very much miss talking to him if things become awkward...
Oh dear, now I'm having second thoughts...

For now, I'll retire to listening to music while doing an assignment.

I Simply Cannot Even

He kissed me on the cheek yesterday

He was so nervous it was just too sweet

He wrote me a poem

I don't care how much that he tells me that he is luckier, I am the one who is the luckiest person in the world. He just makes me feel so special, and he doesn't have to really do much to make me feel happy, and I really don't know what I did to deserve such an incredible guy. In a way, I do sort of hope that he isn't reading this right now, because that is rather embarassing, but nevermind that fact!

What really matters is that he is completely special to me and he never fails to make my day better.

In the case he is reading this, I'm not backing down--I'm the luckier one. <3

Hmm~

Well, today was quite interesting, namely the hour following Rifle Team practice. So, my boyfriend is rather shy when it comes to talking to people [which especially includes me as we have been dating for two days now, and he says he is socially awkward, wich I understand completely], but here's the thing. I had planned on giving him a kiss in the cheek, though it took about a minute for me to actually do so after asking for permission, and even so, since he is 5'8" versus my height of 5'2", I had some trouble with reaching his cheek and fell the first time I tried. Of course he asked if I was alright, but he did chuckle a bit [I did too, though. It was hilarious]. The second time proved successful even if it was a quick peck on the cheek. That and I found out that his password is the anniversary of us dating. Which, I must say, is really sweet. But he won't admit it, though, I really don't mind that, hehehe~

Guess What:

So, now, apparently [and thank you to a friend of mine from Rifle Team] I have a boyfriend. I can completely say that I am taken aback of the suddeness, but it really is nice. And it isn't Mr. A, believe it or not. I mean, he [reffering to "my boyfriend", which I still have trouble calling him that] and I were almost forced to kiss directly [and this was because our two friends who were attempting to get us to kiss found out that both of us have never been kissed--nor kissed someone].
Anyway, no one was injured [I was a tad bit scared that my boyfriend--at the time for about ten minutes--would have been sent to the emergency room. His friend was rather forceful, if I must clarify], so that turned out good, and we didn't end up kissing, too, as the bus arrived convienently so we could escape our friends.

Hahaha. So, yesterday was interesting.

Some More Things Which Are Not Necessarily Relative

-Sigh-

Living as a teenage girl has its hardships, though most not as bad as you would think. Well, I suppose you could say that life has not yet lost its luster [and I do hope it never does!], yet it is beginning to have a set schedule which is rather...boring. Surprisingly enough. Though, I must admit that looking on the "bright side" helps quite a lot, so that's rather good.

Which reminds me of this weekend. Just yesterday [Saturday, May 4, 2014], I baked a rather delicious angel food cake and also whipped up some not-too-shabby chocolate mousse! Ah, now if only I would have some of such luck in love, hahaha. But to be honest, at times I do forget about the entire "I Am Perfectly Fine" ensemble and simply wish for a day of some sort of romance. Ah, to be whisked away by some young man [who hopefully isn't past 19, hahaha] who has a heart of gold, a wonderful personality, and just overall is a pleasure to be with [Like Mr. A].

But I should look on my more realist side. I'm sure that it will take patience, as something such as that [which would be lasting] cannot simply come so fast out of the blue.

Anyway, I suppose that will be it for this post...'Till next time!

Trust Issues

Ever since I had my first "relationship", I've found that trust shouldn't be given out so easily as I do. Even now, although it has been about two years since I broke up with my first "boyfriend", I still am having trouble trusting Mr. Aquarius, who is just so sweet and sincere.

As much as I don't want to trust people, it hurts because I am the type of person who wants to completely trust everyone and help everyone, not push people away because of fears resulting from someone who never cared. I find myself constantly apologizing for making these false assumptions that people want to emotionally hurt me, even lie to me. I feel that this makes me a bigger burden than I already am sometimes, and I feel like I'm always pestering someone when I talk, chat, or even text them.

Now, turning this into a Virgo post.

Virgos tend to be in the partially paranoid to the "mental disoder" type of paranoid range. Going off on this, many Virgoans are afraid of showing any more emotion than what is needed [also, this is for practicality], as they may believe that by letting go of their emotions that they would be subjected to harsh opinions, hatred, or even things like being annoying. Virgos have a calm, collected surface paired up with this underlying fear of rejection, which may make it harder to tell whether or not they truly are afraid, or if this [the feeling that they would be rejected, et cetera] is actually a fact. Virgos, unlike Pisces, tend to test the waters before allowing themselves to do certian things, and that includes relationships. If the waters somehow pose a threat, they will immediately withdrawl and stay on the safety of the land.
Virgos are natural worriers who secretly want to feel appreciated, needed, and loved. They crave this and they look for this in a lover, too.